Calling & Purpose

“Whenever God begins something, we have the assurance that He will finish it. Nothing will stand in the way of Him accomplishing His purpose in this world and in our lives. What God starts, He finishes, and nobody can hinder Him. Sure, delays will happen. Just remember, God is in charge of the delays as well as the progress.” A.W. Tozer

Scripture passages are from Berean Standard Bible available online through bible hub. Images created by author using Night Cafe Studio and Canva Pro.

Considering our call, purpose, and motives

This post addresses those seeking to grow through disappointment, resentment, and failure in ministry or calling. Hope that you will read Christy Rood’s excellent article “When Ministry Leads to Resentment – What Do You Do?” referenced in this post.

https://www.missioalliance.org/when-ministry-leads-to-resentment-what-do-you-do/

Quotes included from Os Guinness The Call: Finding and Fulfilling the Central Purpose of Your Life. All quotes referenced to encourage personal development and reflection.

The Situation and it’s impact

Christy Rood references the 2017 movie Roman J. Israel, Esq to help us consider an issue that those who seek to serve others will face. She writes of this internal struggle:

“Every single person who chooses to pursue a cause over a well-paid career will come to the same existential crisis as Roman J. Israel, Esquire at some point in their lives.”

Roman is a lawyer who works with the poor, disadvantaged class. When his law partner passes away, he realizes that his career must change. Plot summary on wikipedia:

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Roman_J._Israel,_Esq.

Is God’s presence guiding us as we pursue His calling upon our lives? How might our understanding of His nature impact how we serve others?

The Situation : Our Hearts’ Cries

“Is all the nail-biting, penny-pinching, late-night, burden-sharing, self-denying, time-consuming, sacrificial effort worth it? Systems aren’t changing. People’s lives aren’t improving. What little change I do see is minimal, or worse, temporary, eventually returning to the way it was before I poured myself out for it. People don’t appreciate the sacrifices I make. They expect more from me than I’m able to give. I can’t do enough to please them.” Christy Rood

The question: is it worth the cost, does my sacrifice matter? Teachers, ministers, counselors, law enforcement, doctors, nurses, social workers, etc. experience a similar daily battle. The persistent daily battle can be the start of the burn out process–when you constantly sacrifice and no one responds or improves.

Leading and Serving involves rejection and failure(s)

I experienced this during the Covid19 pandemic as a teacher and youth minister. The school system demanded much from teachers as we were teaching students in person, online, and also through a cyber school. It was a difficult time, but one that I was able to endure. However, the burn out came after the crisis.

Often the students faced major difficulties in personal/home lives that made academic success challenging. Students would respond with anger or apathy when trying to help them. In youth ministry, the students’ previous youth pastor left. Due to the pandemic activities were limited, consequently numerous students left the church during “my watch.” It was painful to seek them walk away from the church. When I called them to check in, they explained that they weren’t coming back. Numerous meaningful relationships with students ended. There was nothing that I could do to restore or renew the relationship(s). They chose to not come back for reasons beyond my ability to reconcile/restore.

Failure and burn out invites us to a deeper understanding of calling and dependence on Christ.

Going to the Roots

Recovery demands introspection, honesty, and humility. We must examine our motives, needs, and expectations to move forward in healing. If we don’t locate and deal with the root(s) of the issues, then we will encounter the situation again!

Repeating the Same Mistake

After recovering from a rough year, I returned to work, while serving in supply ministry. This job was a demanding technical job. Supply preaching and working long hours led me straight back to burn out. I was constantly stressed, uncertain, and deeply unhappy. Some situations are beyond a person’s ability to change. I’ve painfully learned to let go and not press ahead when doing so doesn’t benefit the people you’re seeking to serve or yourself.

Not being accepted/others placed ahead of you/

Contemporary church society prefers married pastors over single ones for various reasons. Being consistently “overlooked” or “passed over” by numerous churches tempts me to be bitter. The roots of resentment are perceived rejection and powerlessness to change either myself or the situation. Why am I seeking to serve in a role that many others’ don’t view me as being the right person? Recognizing the reality of perception and preference is it wise to continue on this path? Is it wise to walk a path that leads to deeper resentment and frustration?

The Questions of Motive

Christy reminds us:

Brutal honesty and courage is necessary to answer these questions because you might not like some of what you uncover.

There is no such thing as a purely selfless motive for even our most selfless acts.

We always want something, whether it is external acknowledgment and appreciation, or internal approval and satisfaction. . .

The outbursts of complaint when we who serve a cause feel disrespected or undervalued may reveal our desire to receive something for our efforts.

When we feel these complaints rising up in our soul, we need to ask God for wisdom and discernment. The point of this isn’t to blame others or ourselves. The solution is to ask God for insight into our motives and expectations. A helpful journal activity involves writing out on paper your hopes, expectations, and needs. Listing them and prayerfully discerning leads to insight and growth.

When our expectations and needs aren’t being met then weariness and discontent grows. If this process continues it leads to resentment and bitterness. Resentment and bitterness then leads to burnout.

Consider Jesus, He faced numerous difficulties and betrayals. Yet, He remained true to His Heavenly Father. Jesus rests in God the Father’s presence.

Burnout and Our response

We are responsible for allowing ourselves to reach burn-out. We need to recognize when we are starting to resent people or situations that haven’t “worked out”. Christy explores the idea of our identity. After we list out our needs, expectations, and motives–we need to consider how we define ourselves. What gives us meaning? What is our purpose? Why are we seeking to serve others? These are important questions because it leads us to carefully discern our purpose and calling.

Painful and personal insights

Reflecting on the situations and encounters that led me into a dark season of discontent, several things are apparent in hindsight. First, if we are striving and pushing forward, we are wise to consider why, how, and to what end. Why am I pushing ahead? Am I pushing ahead in a sustainable manner? When this goal or objective is complete, how does it look? The spiritual journey is not a sprint, it’s a marathon run. I run sprints to train for my mountain boarding/wind surfing sport. Running distance is a different training. It requires different pacing and techniques.

Secondly, am I striving for what God calls me to do or for what I think I should be or do? This is a key issue. Knowing yourself and your passions–do they align with this ministry? I am passionate about teaching and studying–more than building close relationships. I missed out on the importance of relationships. Failing to use object lessons and showing real world examples while focusing on terminology and “knowledge.” I wrongly believed that teaching people about Christ is what they really needed. What people need is to see Christ active in our lives. This comes through relationships–more so than through Bible lectures. Relationship proceeds the teaching.

Most Important Relationship is with God first then others

“Calling is not only a matter of being and doing what we are but also of becoming what we are not yet but are called by God to be.” Os Guinness

Quote Source: https://www.goodreads.com/work/quotes/95139-the-call-finding-and-fulfilling-the-central-purpose-of-your-life

If we are serving in a situation that isn’t aligned with our calling and gifts then we are certainly going to frustrate others and ourselves! There are seasons in ministry that correspond to our “seasons” in life. Some roles in church ministry are best for people in the corresponding season of life. A pastor with a family and children/teens can relate to other families in a manner in which a single man can’t. The experience of marriage, children, etc. is vitally important in church leadership and meeting the members’ need(s).

Creating Identity in service

What drives our desires for recognition? Christy explains:

“These identity beliefs and others are what drive our desires for affirmation, approval, and appreciation. When we dig past desires to their roots, we might discover that we have been using our cause to prop up our identity.“

When the cause comes apart, so does our identity! It’s building a structure on the sinking sands of “cause” and ministry. When we serve because it’s who we are, then it’s devastating when others reject us. God calls us to serve from an identity of love built upon His redemption and presence in our lives. Take a moment to consider this truth:

It’s a bitter pill to swallow, but someone who works a full-time job and only has time to teach Sunday School or serve at a soup kitchen once a month may be more pleasing to God than you, if they are serving out of love and you are not.

God does not care that you give more of your time and money to a cause than someone else. He only cares that your service is offered in love to him and the people you serve. Christy Rood

God’s Call and Gospel

“Calling is more than purely cultural, but it is also more than purely personal. Discover the meaning of calling and you discover the heart of the gospel itself.” Os Guinness

The Bible presents God as One who calls, equips, and works through the lives of men and women to accomplish His purposes. In receiving His grace and righteousness, we begin a journey of becoming more like Christ. The Good News of the Gospel is that God calls and then transforms broken and sinful men/women into agents of transformation for others! Paul teaches this concept in 2 Corinthians chapters 4 & 5. We are His ambassadors strategically placed in the world of His creation!

As we mature in our “calling,” we are touch by His Gospel and seek to live forth His Good News! Os Guiness’ book is a good read that has helped me to better understand what it means to be “called.” The reality is that God calls everyone He redeems to give testimony and love others! (The Great Commission).

The Call to Love

“The heart of the life of faith in answer to the call of God is a call to a relationship, and a relationship of love.” Os Guinness

Our witness matters! That our lives radiate His grace, kindness, and righteousness.

The Good News: He is in the delays

After writing at length about the difficulties, here is the wonderful solution! God will complete what He starts! This is why that I opened this post with Tozer’s quote. God is working even in our failures and set backs. Tozer reminds us “Sure, delays will happen. Just remember, God is in charge of the delays as well as the progress.”

When burn out or failures stop us dead in our tracks, we don’t face it alone. Burn out, failure, discontent, etc are invitations to go deeper in Christ! When we reach the end our ourselves, we find God is sufficient. That is Paul’s testimony and example! Paul reminds the Philippian believers that God will complete the good work.

The potter finishes his work, unaware of the unseen helper. He is not alone is His work! God is working in our lives as He molds and shapes us. When we feel alone, we can rest in His unseen Presence.

Philippians 1:3-6

3I thank my God every time I remember you. 4In every prayer for all of you, I always pray with joy, 5because of your partnership in the gospel from the first day until now, 6being confident of this, that He who began a good work in you will carry it on to completion until the day of Christ Jesus.

What does this mean? Source of quotes: (emphasis mine)

https://www.gotquestions.org/He-who-began-a-good-work-in-you.html

From the moment God begins His good work in us until the day of its completion, the Holy Spirit is chipping away, renovating our character, day by day reforming us into partakers of the holy nature of God. . .

God began a good work in us at salvation and then called us to live out the progressing development of being made into His image.

The Christian walk is a pathway of ongoing growth. The journey brings us ever closer to God until His work in us is perfect and complete on “the day of Jesus Christ”—that is, the day of Christ’s return when we see Him (Colossians 3:4; 1 Thessalonians 5:23).

On the other side of burn-out, rejection, and frustration lies a field of restoration and peace. God works through our burn-out and frustration to purge us of our selfishness and wrong notions of ourselves, others, and His call. He leads us to a deeper experience of His grace, love, mercy, compassion, and holiness as we rely upon His presence more than our human perception.